The Stories That Shape Our Lives
You’ve been influenced to believe and behave a certain way based on stories you’ve learned about the world in your upbringing Some of these stories may have been beneficial, but others may have led to you living a life you didn’t necessarily want to live The words you place after “I am” have a direct impact on you because it’s harder to change what you believe is set in stone and wired into your personality If you drag the subtle stories you tell yourself into the light, examine them, and question them, you can learn to see yourself and the world as they really are
What are some of the deep-seated stories you tell yourself about the world around you, circumstances, or “reality”? Can you find examples that disprove these statements?
What are some of the deep-seated stories you tell yourself about yourself (your “I am” statements)? Can you find any examples to disprove these statements?
Take the “I am” statements you just wrote and turn them into “I’m working on” statements. This will reframe the stories you tell yourself from set-it-stone traits to areas with room for growth
How to Examine Your Life
Until you own up to the mistakes you’ve made in the past, you’ll never be able to move forward as a new person Circumstances dictate your life to a certain degree, but at some point, it’s important to take responsibility for your role in them Mistakes are only costly if you decide to never learn from them.
What are some of the key mistakes you made in the past? What can you learn from them moving forward?
What are some rationalizations you’ve made about your life that you need to own up to?
Surrender and Acceptance – How to Let Go of Your Negative Past
It’s easy to fall into the trap of wishing things were different. You can replay your life story with scenes you wish turned out differently, or you can accept where you are right now Until you forgive yourself for what you’ve done and what has been done to you, you’ll stay stuck Instead of thinking in terms of change or self-improvement, think it terms of death to your former self.
What parts of your identity are you clinging onto because of time invested, influences around you, or wanting to avoid the truth?
What are some circumstances/situations you wish were different but can’t change immediately? What actions will you choose to focus on instead?
What do you need to forgive yourself for so you can start over?
What beliefs, personality traits, and actions are you going to KILL so you can be born again?
The First Day of the Rest of Your Life
We all tell ourselves stories about life. Make yours the hero’s journey Certainty of any form doesn’t exist. Why not put fate in your hands instead of someone else’s?
The more you say yes to new opportunities, the more chances you have of attracting serendipity
What are some “myths of certainty” in your life that you cling to for a false sense of security?
You’re the hero in the movie who says, “Enough is enough” and realize they have potential. Add a few statements to pump yourself up.
What are some intriguing opportunities you’ve said “no” to in the past that you’re going to say yes to now?
How to Reinvent Yourself
Experiments help you acquire the skills you need to reinvent yourself.
Passion doesn’t come from introspection. It comes from action. Until you test your theories, your “inner passions” will remain untested assumptions.
If you adopt the mind of someone conducting experiments with their life, you’ll never truly fail.
What seems obvious to you that isn’t apparent to others?
What do you find yourself talking about with friends to the point they won’t get you to shut up?
If you could only choose one section in the bookstore to read, what would it be?
What do you remember being drawn to or interested in as a child?
What kind of articles do you read and share online?
What have you witnessed someone else doing that made you think “wow that would be cool?”
Know Your Enemy – How to Fight the Resistance
The Resistance is responsible for snuffing out the dreams of millions of people. Your path to the life you deserve involves waging war with the Resistance The Resistance is cunning and will attack you in both overt and subtle ways The Resistance never goes away. If you wait for your fear to disappear before you act, you’ll be waiting forever
What are some ways the Resistances likes to attack you specifically?
What are some actions you can take to fight against the Resistance?
Write down a statement to declare war against the Resistance. Talk about why it’s important to defeat it and how you’re going to do it.
The Key Ingredients to Change
Rewards foster change better than goals do Your environment has a large impact on your behavior Much of what you see and hear is useless noise. Be more discerning about what you choose to accept and believe.
Create prize statements to motivate you towards pursuing your new path or venture.
What are some obvious negative actions or decisions you’re going to avoid in the future?
What are some changes you can make to your environment to help you create lasting change in your life?
What are some actions you can take to develop a filter to help you designate between signal and noise?
Stop Waiting to be Picked
We’re living in the most prosperous time in human history Technology has leveled the playing field in areas such as skill acquisition and entrepreneurship You have no excuses for not living the life you want.
Provide a few examples that show how technology has made achieving success easier Provide examples of people succeeding in the new economy that inspire you What excuses can you no longer make given the times we’re living in?
Pivot, Quit, or Start Over
It’s important to know when to pursue further or when to quit. Oftentimes, the answer is pursuing further, but there are rare cases where a path leads to nowhere. Exhaust your options before calling it quits.
The longer you remain in one general area of expertise, the higher your chances of success.
The only absolute death to your dreams is quitting on your life altogether.