GOLDEN RULE #1: You’ve Done Nothing Wrong
In order to realize the truth of “You did nothing wrong,” we need to use self-compassion, one of the soul’s attributes, to shift out of regret and into rejoicing. Self-compassion is the ability to be easy with yourself. It is the opposite of harshness. It is a moment of growth that requires no punishment, condemnation, or criticism, in order to learn from anyone’s actions. No matter how harsh of a world you feel you live in, no matter how ruthless of a past you may have endured, self-compassion says, “Can you just take one moment and be the nicest, most supportive and open-minded person that you are encountering right now?” Can you meet yourself as an ally instead of an enemy? Can you turn inward and say to yourself, “Hello, friend, how can I be here for you?”
GOLDEN RULE #2: Anyone Who Blames You Isn’t Happy
When someone’s in their ego, they’re not aware their attitude and behavior are associated with their degree of happiness. This is one of the main insights people are unaware of when operating from a state of unconsciousness. When people are unhappy, what’s their viewpoint? I’m unhappy with you. In unconsciousness, you’re the reason for someone’s happiness or unhappiness. Being the reason for someone’s happiness is a form of co-dependency and being the reason for some else’s unhappiness is a projection of blame.
GOLDEN RULE #3: Hardships Can Be Fast-Tracked through Thankfulness
Hardship is how your nervous system responds to adversity. Adversity is how you perceive and relate to change or loss. Change and loss are some of the deepest ways in which life evolves you out of ego and into alignment with your soul. Change and loss occur through moments of renewal and erosion that come and go like the seasons or weather patterns. As you experience the nature of change and loss from the soul’s sense of excitement, instead of the ego’s perception of judgment, you are able to let go with authenticity and ease. Only the soul lets go. Equally so, all the ego can do is maintain struggle, judgment, and negotiation.
GOLDEN RULE #4: Feeling Better Helps Everyone Heal
When shifting from ego to soul, you are becoming one with the light within yourself. One of the first steps of becoming that light is allowing yourself to shine at full capacity—no matter the circumstances in view. It’s not that people can’t deal with your perfection, it’s that people don’t know how to deal with their own perfection. An ego would rather see itself as imperfect because at least it’s understandable. That which is understandable gives the ego something to manage and maintain. There is no role in perfection. There is nothing for the ego to do. This is why it settles for lesser, more understandable versions of self.
GOLDEN RULE #5: Well-Being Is a Signal that You Are Ready to Embody Your Potential
Whether you’re aware of it or not, you’re always breathing this light in and out. The question is, why don’t you always feel the well-being if that’s what well-being is? It is because your breath is only giving you the experience of your awareness of what breath is. If you think breath is just the very thing that keeps you alive, then that becomes the extent of your breathing experience. The more you become aware of what the breath actually is, as the living evidence of light within you, the more every single breath provides you with the well-being that becomes the contribution of expansion the world is destined to receive.
GOLDEN RULE #6: The Universe Always Has a Plan
Your desire for what you want is remembering what’s already been created. Throughout the dimension of time, you are preparing to receive at a higher level by cultivating the maturity and worthiness to actually have what you want, without slowing or stalling the trajectory of your ever-growing expansion. If you got what you wanted at the wrong time, it would stunt your growth by distracting you with shiny new objects. The Universe has to give you what you want, but in a way that complements and continues your rate of expansion. This is why everything happens over a period of time. If you could snap your fingers and heal right now, it would indicate that there was never a greater purpose for having something to heal.
GOLDEN RULE #7: Everything Changes, But It Can Only Change You for the Better
When adversity enters your life, what is really happening? Adversity is often how you interpret change or loss. When the perception of adversity strikes, it means your current rhythm has been disrupted to let you know it’s time to grow and expand to the next level. When this happens, that jarring rhythmic disruption simultaneously expands the light of your soul, while also triggering your ego. As you become more emotionally free, you are more aware of how often the soul expands, instead of feeling overwhelmed by the reactive nature of your ego.
GOLDEN RULE #8: In Order to Be Emotionally Free, It’s Okay to Dislike
Dislike is just a momentary way of becoming aware of the authenticity of your experience. I’m here to remind you, in order to be emotionally free, it’s okay to dislike. If you try to tell yourself that you cannot dislike because that’s not what it means to be a perfectly evolved spiritual being, you’re holding yourself accountable to an impossible criteria of expectations and standards.
You are not here to be perfect. You’re here to embrace how perfect you already are. The most direct way to understand how perfect you already are is to embrace the authenticity of your subjective experience. Don’t try to like what you already dislike. Give yourself the right to dislike whatever bothers you, what captures your attention that does not match the deepest values you hold to be true.
GOLDEN RULE #9: Projecting Anger Drains You of Energy
As empaths or those who are sensitive to the energies and experiences of others, we tend to be exhausted, even when witnessing the anger of others. The reason why other people’s anger can drain you of energy is because you’re actually sensing how drained they are by their anger, even if and when they’re not aware of it. Naturally, the next question is: How do you deal with the emotional density that manifests as anger in the most conscious way, so as not to be drained of energy or do harm unto others? The answer always comes in one of the soul’s highest attributes and one of the most critical and undervalued tools on the spiritual journey: your creativity.
If you’re angry with someone, you could try writing them a letter and not sending it. Hide your stamps. Put your phone on airplane mode. Write a letter that is so outrageous, it almost embarrasses you to put it on paper. When you have given yourself permission to just spare no expense in expressing your anger in the written word, whether on a computer or a piece of paper, get rid of it. This is how you release the energy.
GOLDEN RULE #10: Love Is Your Liberator
Love begins with honesty. When you are loving, you are honest about your pain. Honesty brings attention to the parts that beg to remember its eternal wholeness. Like a processional line of emotions standing single file, they’re waiting to be embraced by the light of their Source.
That Source is none other than you. One by one, anger, sadness, jealousy, betrayal—all in line to be accepted, respected, honored, and admired—just as they are. Anger will never stop being angry. Hurt will never stop hurting. It’s just waiting to be loved. We’re not here to change the viewpoint of our experiences; we’re here to love the experiences arising within us—even when the next one in line to be loved is the feeling of dislike.
We are here to be the love that we are, and it starts with being honest with ourselves.